The Top 5 Myths About Parenting Arrangements Debunked

What Every Parent Needs to Know

Who your child will live with can be a complex and emotionally charged aspect of any separation. Often, this leads to a swirling vortex of misinformation that can cause unnecessary stress. Whether you’re just getting started or in the thick of it, it’s crucial to separate fact from fiction. Let’s debunk five of the most common myths surrounding parenting arrangements, so that you can navigate the process with confidence.

Myth 1: Mothers Always Get Primary Care

The Reality: 

There’s a common belief that courts favour mothers when it comes to awarding primary care. While this may have been the case in the past, The Family Law Act 1975 (Act) regards the best interests of the children as the most important consideration in parenting matters over any gender bias. The Act provides that subject to any risk concerns, it is generally in children’s best interests to have a relationship with both parents are for both parents to be responsible for the care and welfare of children.

What You Need to Know: 

Both parents have an equal opportunity at gaining care for their children, as courts consider various factors like emotional ties, financial stability, and the ability to provide a safe environment. However, the parenting arrangements that you establish early on in separation are critical and will often be difficult to change, therefore, if you are not satisfied with such arrangements you should act quickly.

Myth 2: Kids Can Choose Where They Want to Live

The Reality: 

Many people think that a child above a certain age can choose which parent to live with. You may make an application to the Court in relation to parenting matters at any time until children turn 18 years old, however, it is rare to initiate proceedings in relation to teenage children.

What You Need to Know: 

The child’s preference might be taken into account, especially for older children, but it’s not the sole determining factor. Courts will look at the entire situation to make their decision.

Myth 3: Parenting Arrangements are Set in Stone

The Reality: 

Many believe that once a parenting arrangement is finalised, it can’t be changed. This isn’t true. Life and circumstances change, and the courts recognise that.

What You Need to Know: 

Parenting agreements can often be modified if there is a significant change in circumstances. This can include a change in financial situation, relocation, or even the child’s own needs as they grow older.

Myth 4: Non-Contact Parents Have No Say

The Reality: 

There’s a misconception that the non-contact parent has little to no say in their child’s life. This is not generally the case.

What You Need to Know: 

As above, The Act provides that subject to any risk concerns, it is generally in children’s best interests to have a relationship with both parents are for both parents to be responsible for the care and welfare of children. This means that even if one parent is the primary carer of the child, the other parent has equal parental responsibility, meaning they have a say in significant life decisions like education and healthcare.

Myth 5: You Don’t Need a Lawyer’s Help

The Reality: 

Some people think they can navigate the complicated maze of parenting arrangements on their own perhaps to save money or to keep things “simple.” For some people this may work, but if it doesn’t…

What You Need to Know: 

If you are unable to negotiate satisfactory parenting arrangements directly, you should consider mediation (also referred to as Family Dispute Resolution or FDR). This is a government subsidised low cost or free service generally accessed through the Family Relationships Centre or Relationships Australia. At FDR, you may attempt to negotiate a Parenting Plan which is a written agreement that sets out parenting arrangements for the children. A Parenting Plan is not legally enforceable, however, it is generally sufficient for the majority of families and will still be relevant to any future legal proceedings if necessary.

If you cannot resolve matters by direct negotiation or at FDR, you can consider Court action. The Court generally requires the parties to have undertaken FDR and provide a certificate confirming that you have done so, however, if your matter is urgent the Court may exempt you from the FDR requirement;

Separating fact from fiction is critical when you’re dealing with something as sensitive and important as your child. Knowledge is your best tool to ensure that the process is as smooth as possible for both you and your child. And remember, you don’t have to go it alone—we are family lawyers that can guide you every step of the way.

Got questions or need clarification? Haven Legal Co. are here to help. Feel free to reach out, and let’s make sure you’re equipped with the facts you need to protect your family’s future.